Understanding
by Yui-Mag
Summary: After the fight that takes place between Schwarz and Weiss, the members of Weiss are laying low until news reaches them that Fujimaya Aya has traumatic retrograde amnesia. Now comes the time to decide...remain in Weiss or back to normal life? Omi's p.o.v
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I do not own any of these characters. I'm just borrowing them for the time being.  Enjoy.

Chapter 1:

The news came to us when we were still recovering from our final attack with Schwarz. The one where they'd been trying to open the gates to hell—literally. Or something along those lines. I hadn't actually stopped and asked one of them what the heck they were trying to accomplish by summoning that _thing_ through the body of a pure, un-aging child.

I remember the date. I remember the time. I remember I was watching outside the window as the sky changed from that dark blue-not quite black color into an un-definable shade of grey. I had shivered knowing that this exact color announced a cold and bleak day. I wasn't sleeping because my shoulder ached, the medicine had long worn off, and because I just _couldn't_. I felt like we still needed to be on the lookout. After all, if we mere mortals had managed to survive a fucking building crumbling onto us, a handful of guys that have telepathy, telekinesis, mad-man like qualities, and visions of the future were definitely going to survive the dunking.

The heavy clouds that blocked the sun from seeping colors back into the world made my reflection in the window that much sharper—large blue eyes, child-like features, along with dark patches of skin that were bruised and getting lost in the shadows. The only warning Manx gave to startle me out of my reverie was the slight noise of a key being placed into a lock. It had been done carefully. And if we'd been anything but trained assassins, we wouldn't have even noticed it. My muscles tensed and reached for the arrows that I kept carefully hidden on me. Injured I may be, but not any less paranoid and not any less careful. A quick glance behind me showed that the other occupants of the room were twitching. Aya's eyes were open and he was moving quietly off his bed. He stilled as he noticed me… and with just a brief movement here and there, we made our plan silently. Yoji and Ken would be back-ups. I remember feeling that flood of intense energy and fear mixed into one suddenly die down with a sense of purpose. I had to keep them safe. As always, my silent mission came back to me and with it was this little nagging hope that it would be the last mission. That this mission would take me away finally. Another little noise as I crept deeper into our safe house. Whoever it was, had managed to open the door. I flipped the arrow into the right position.

The lights were flicked on in one brisk movement. Not part of the plan but whatever, the change in lighting was not going to be a problem. But the figure suddenly revealing herself did. No danger. The adrenaline rushing through my veins making the blood pound into my ears did not like this change. Did not like it at all. I felt my muscles go weak at the sight of her. Curling red-hair, a pale but strict face…

"Manx."

"Bombay." She greeted back serenely, confident that despite breaking into our safe place without one warning that she'd been safe all along. It was enough to make me want to scream. Instead the mask I'd been taught so long ago to wear crept back up and placed itself firmly back on. A smile, a lightening in the eyes, the muscles loosening and my aching fingers uncramping their tight hold.

"Please sit down." I gave a little sideways look as I waved her to the kitchen table with my good arm. The arrow had already been placed back in its hiding spot. I caught amethyst eyes quickly before they retreated further back into the shadows no doubt to let the others know that they could go back to sleep. As if they could now…I shook my head. "Coffee?" The woman leaned against the kitchen counter and ignored the question.

"Its Abyssinian I need." No wasted words. No how are you? How are you guys healing? How's the house? It was the best we could do in our limited time and great surprise that you four actually survived. No nothing like that. I nodded my head.

"Of course. He'll be here soon."

"He stays." The deeper voice announced his presence. "They all do." I really did try to keep the surprise showing on my face at that statement. Ken, ruffled and in pain, hid a yawn for show before slumping down to the table. Yoji followed at a slower pace, silent as he had been since we'd showed up on shore. He didn't even bother glancing in Manx's direction to admire her form. Aya mirrored Manx's stance, leaning against the wall opposite of her.

"Aya-kun?" Again, I was ignored. I looked between the two redheads and then shrugged, taking my place by Yoji's side, knowing instinctively that he needed the small comfort right now even if I didn't know the specific reason as to why.

"Fine." Manx snapped. "Might as well get more out of this meeting then. Status?" Ken rolled his eyes and mouthed 'pushy bitch' before looking at her with a quirked eyebrow.

"Status is still the same as two days ago-we're still recovering." It summed it up well. Manx didn't seem quite convinced as she stared at me.

"Hm. Well some of you seem to be recovering faster than others. Perhaps mission ready in a couple days…" She trailed off. It hadn't really sounded like a question and I felt the others tense around me in response to it. I gave her my brightest smile. Her eyes scanned my face and then glazed over. She gave a minute shrug and then gazed back up to Aya. "This information really is just for you." Strange. Her tone of voice had softened. The tension began to build its way back into my body, making the adrenaline sing within me. Silence greeted her. Something about our last mission had changed Aya in some way. Perhaps because his revenge was over, perhaps because he'd saved his sister, perhaps because we'd been there along side with him when everything went to hell—I… "She's awake but she has no memory." Manx didn't have to explain who the she was. Four pair of eyes turned to her as one. "The doctor thinks her amnesia is from shock. Whether it's temporary or not remains to be seen." Manx shifted her weight more equally on her high heels. "What would you like us to do?"

And that's how we found out. And that's when we stopped taking time to recover.

To be continued…


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer- Story inspired by the lyrics and song "Understanding" by Evanescence. The song is from their _Origin_ cd which I highly recommend.

Chapter 2:

"_You hold the answers deep within your own mind. Consciously, you've forgotten it. That's the way the human mind works. Whenever something is too unpleasant, too shameful for us to entertain, we reject it. We erase it from our memories. But the imprint is always there."_

_Omi frowned at the words the older man was telling him. "But what if I want to remember? How do I get these answers?" A warm and calloused finger poked him in the middle of his forehead and then smoothed the skin, erasing the frown. The eyes that regarded him were not as warm. Nor were they as caring as the movement belied._

_"You don't want to. Its unnecessary baggage." _

_"But…?"_

_"That's enough." Omi looked down, small hands curling together in a helpless manner. "If ever comes a time when you need to remember, you will." The words were final. The hope to remember unfolded a bit in the child's chest before being coldly pushed aside. "Its time for your training." The older hand moved to press itself on Omi's back. "And…" There was a pause as the man hesitated on what to call him. Omi looked up, blinking his blue eyes at him. The hesitation didn't last nearly long enough as the man finally settled on not calling him anything at all. The eyes took on a colder and sterner glint. "…no more of this running away or coming down to the office business. You are no longer a child."_

_Omi nodded slightly, shame heating his cheeks and the back of his neck. He moved away from the man that had saved his life only to place him in a cage. "Yes Persia." He muttered slowly and no longer bothered to look back._

"Is it painful to not remember?" The question was asked in a hissed and slightly pained voice. Two weeks had passed since Manx's abrupt night visit. Two weeks of dealing with a brooding and dangerous Aya as the man worked through his own emotions. I wasn't that surprised when finally, he snapped and turned to me for…comfort? No. Answers? Perhaps. I leaned back into my chair and pushed my plate away. I hadn't been hungry in the first place.

"Aya—maybe this isn't," Ken started, eyes looking worriedly in my direction. It made me wonder what exactly was showing on my face. I was startled to realize that my smile trembled on the verge of becoming a grimace.

"Not physically painful." I answered and then with a small shrug of my shoulders, I added the next bit carefully. "It's the longing to know the truth that is. Its knowing that there might be people who care about you still out there and that you don't know them…" In my case, I'd been hugely disappointed. "It's the dreams that are the worse." I managed to whisper. "They feel and sometimes _are_ vague memories that your mind taunts you with. But with no proof, you never know what they really are. Dreams? Memories? It drives you mad." Like the pale feminine feet swinging in the air. "Aya." Floating really, as if they were light as a feather. "Like Manx said, the decision is yours to make." But they hadn't been. Those feet had been heavy. "You're the only reminder of her past and probably the best chance she has of recovering her memories." They had been dragging that woman down, down to the earth. "She could recover on her own but…" A hard coil of rope wrapped around her pale neck kept her from being dragged down. And so she kept floating. She kept flying. She was an angel. Right? Right?

A warm hand clasped my upper arm. I found myself staring straight into Aya's eyes. "Is it worth it? Do you regret remembering?" There was no concern for my wellbeing, no care in his eyes at all. Cold and stern. Much like how I remember Persia's to be. Those pale white feet swinging in the air…I moved to cover his hand with my own. We both were ignoring Ken at this point who was shuffling around us like an anxious hen.

"No. I don't regret it." I only regret that I didn't die with the rest of them. "Not knowing…" Swinging. "…not understanding…" Floating. "…is much worse." Flying. The warmth of his hand left me and my own fell limply back to my side.

"I don't want to," He stopped, voice sounding nearly strangled. A strange contrast from the cold and clipped, demanding tone that all of us had grown used to hearing. It even stopped Ken where he was and made Yoji lift his head from where it had been resting. "I don't want to involve her in this." He made a stiff movement with his neck, jerking his chin at us.

"You can leave." I started, barely recognizing my voice as the words tumbled past my lips. "You've had your revenge. You've done more than your share. We're all alive. You can end this and live with her." Go back to her. Run towards her, escape the bad men, run to her, she'll keep you safe, she'll keep you warm…she was…swinging. "You don't owe us _anything_." Mother? A strangled noise behind me. I nearly twitched as the memory tried to take over my mind. Swinging. "You always made it clear that we were only working partners and that once your duty was taken care of…" Floating. Somebody was screaming. No. No. No screaming. In the past. In the past. I'm in the kitchen. I'm with the others. I'm fine. "You'd be done." Flying. "You _are_ done." I tried to make my voice more gentle, more understanding. "Go."

When the fuck had I become the one that Aya needed permission from? He didn't give a damn! He never had and yet…His amethyst eyes looked bleak and were looking at me with such a desperate need. I gave him permission with a smile and a nod. It looked like something crumpled within him and then he shook his head.

"I can't." The words were spoken so softly. Can't what? Can't leave? Hah! You've left before. I wanted to shout the words out at him. The anger was shielding me from the memories. The anger was good. It kept me focused on the present. It kept me anchored on the here and now. "Help me get her memories back."

"Wh-what? Aya…"

"You know what its like. You'll be able to understand her. You'll be able to help her and protect her." Yoji shifted, eyes wide. "Please. All of you. Come with me." Aya took a breath in, showing more emotions in that one moment than I'd seen in all the times we'd been working together. "I don't know how to be her brother anymore. I don't know if I can be." Vulnerable. Broken. The anger melted away.

"Ok." Ken answered weakly, coming to Aya's side. The redhead was surprised and stiffened at the sudden proximity. I wasn't. Ken lives by his emotions and he's a natural caretaker. He can't stand seeing someone suffer. It makes him impulsive, warm, and short tempered. Someone you'd prefer to call your friend rather than your enemy. "We'll help you out…for as long as you need us and then we'll hit the road, k?" Ok? I blinked. No. No I don't think that'll be ok. Manx was going to skin me alive.

"We—" I faltered. The others were just as free to leave as Aya was. I was the only one caged. "I can't stop working for Kritiker."

"We can keep our 'job' from her. We've done it before with Sakura-chan and Momo-chan." Ken responded quickly not giving anyone time to remind him of how well _that_ had turned out. "And you won't be ready for any kind of mission for awhile despite what Manx thinks. Just cause you can move around and use one arm doesn't mean you're completely healed." He snorted, frown coming onto his face. I sighed. If only it could be that simple. "It can work." Ah the irritation was coming. "Yoji?" The older man sighed and sat up straight. Still he refused to look at any of us.

"You know I'll do all I can to help the ladies." I closed my eyes.

"Omi?"

The swinging feet. Mommy? I need to be held. I need to be comforted. The bad men… the bad men were…A gagging sound behind me. A hard warm hand covering my eyes. Trying to claw them off. They were floating and flying. Mommy…

"Omi? You don't look so good…" I snapped my eyes open.

"Only till you're ready to be a brother on your own and only as long as Kritiker allows us to 'recover'." I whispered. And then…and then I'll be gone.

To be continued…


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

_Can't wash it all away_

The house was far away from the rest of the world. It was larger than the broken down place we'd been staying at during our initial "recovery". It had more than one bedroom for starters. Three at least as I glanced down at the floor plans. Two bathrooms, a basement, a kitchen, and a living room. It was a luxury I wasn't used to having and the amount of space we'd have made my skin crawl. The more space, the more openings you gave your enemies. The floor plans memorized, I rolled them back up and started to make a mental plan on what additional securities we would need.

"The van is here." Ken muttered, poking his head into the room. I nodded and gave him a quick smile before turning away from him. I fiddled with my brace and glanced around the empty room one last time. There had been no sound of footsteps moving away from the doorway. "Omi?" Ken started gently.

"Hm?"

"Are you ok?" He moved closer as he asked, placing his arms around me in a protective embrace. Before Ken-kun came, I used to dream about what it would feel like to be touched like this. During my time with Kritiker, the times I would be touched would be for training purposes— a pat on the back or on the head to let me know I'd done good or a prod to let me know otherwise. At school the touches were even less. I would see how others interacted with each other and a part of me would yearn to join them. But my world had changed. I couldn't simply join them. Not with all the blood that'd been spilt and…they were just so damned innocent. I felt alien next to them. So I would just dream about it, trying to recall from the deepest parts of my mind what it had felt like. Surely _someone_ in my past would have held me, ne? But then Ken came and I suddenly didn't have to dream about it anymore. He had almost needed the physical touch more than I did. It seemed to heal him like nothing else could or did.

I remember watching him the first day, as he slumped into a chair—glaring at me like I had personally made his life a living hell. "How old are you?" He'd finally snapped much to my surprise. I'd been mentally debating whether it was safe enough to get closer and take the seat across from him. "Che. I'm not gonna bite you!" And he'd reached out his hand like it had been the easiest gesture in the world. I took his hand and smiled and never really answered his question. I couldn't have even if I had wanted to. I didn't remember how old I was, didn't remember when my birthday was…all that I had were meaningless numbers that Persia, in all his great kindness, had constructed for me. Ken-kun was and sometimes still is, my greatest teacher in how to act like I'm just a normal kid without a care in the world. And he's probably the most blind to it. He doesn't know. Nor will he ever. I've been trained to fit and blend into the world, taking whatever knowledge from whatever source that will help me in completing the next mission. When Weiss was created, the need for me to be _normal_, to be _innocent_ and _childlike_…to represent home to these broken men became my greatest priority.

I no longer tense or hate when he touches me like this and sometimes wonder a bit how I could have in the first place. I reach to place my own hands around his arms and lean my head back until I can see his face.

"What makes you think something is wrong?" I ask, my tone implying that I'm now worried about him. He scowls at that, tightening his hold and making me squeak. My shoulder did not enjoy that. It was only in the sling part of the day but tended to be sore first thing in the morning. A broken collarbone took 3-4 weeks on average to heal. I was only on my third week. His arms loosened their hold as he realized that he'd hurt me.

"Sorry!" He takes a step back and I hide a shiver at the sudden invasion of cold where his warmth had been just seconds before. "It's just that," He runs a shaky hand through his hair as I turn to face him. "…you're just recovering from remembering your own memories. And the look on your face last night…" Funny. I think that's the first time one of them has visibly worried about that. After all, when I remembered, wasn't I allowed to still participate in more than one mission? Wasn't I there when Aya took my father's life—not even bothering to see whether I cared or whether it was my right to take that man's life instead of him? He'd been the one to sell me. He'd been the one that had…ruined everything good in my life.

"What look?" I gave a little laugh. "Don't worry so much Ken-kun. I'm good. I really am."

"Then why do you look so…" He hesitated again and gave an impatient sigh. "Pained and worried?" I blinked and looked around the room.

"Ken-kun," I started my voice soft and soothing. "I'm worried because the move is happening so fast and security isn't as tight as it should be." What in all hells was Manx thinking anyway? "Once I get there and have my way with it, I'll feel better. And I'm not in any kind of pain." The look he gave me then could only be described as unbelieving. I didn't blame him. It wasn't one of my better lies. But… "I don't know how I can help her." I added slowly. "I don't know how I can help him."

There wasn't really anything he could say to that. He sensed it and it made him uncomfortable. I felt bad and just gave another one of my smiles. I've been smiling for so many years now even when there was nothing at all to smile about, that I just can't stop.

"Let's go."

_Can't wish it all away_

The truth was and it dawned on me as we were more than ½ way to the new house, I didn't know whether I had told Aya the truth or not. There were days when I yearned to forget everything again. To be a blank slate where everything you are is what you make of it now. There was pain no matter what path lay ahead.

Pain in not knowing.

Pain in remembering.

Persia had said that the imprint of the memory would always be there. I believe him. There are many parts of my past that are still hidden deep within me. I feel their weight, their darkness, and I don't know whether I should reach out for them or whether I should hide. The nightmares I wake from are probably answer enough.

A bump in the road relieved me from having to think further on the matter. The pain it caused my shoulder was enough for me to release a hiss and raise my other hand to brace it. "Sorry." Yoji muttered, his eyes glancing at us from the rearview mirror. "You guys ok back there?" I feel more than see Aya nod for the both of us and hear Ken move in his front seat so he can inspect us.

"We're good." I answer the question more vocally. "How much farther?" I ask, hoping to distract Ken long enough from truly looking at me again and seeing through the perfectly innocent white lie.

"A couple more minutes." Ken mutters sitting straight once more as Yoji takes a rather wide turn to miss another ditch in the road. "I hate dirt roads. They should be paved." He groans. Silence made its way back into the van as the last turn was made and all of sudden we were facing it. The house was plain on the outside, surrounded by trees from either side. It was so far up the mountain that we would have very few neighbors apart from the wildlife that is. There was another vehicle already there. Manx stuck her head out from the front door of the house as we pulled up the rest of the drive. She watched as we made our way out of the car, clumsily stretching out sore muscles and removing only what was necessary from the van before making our way towards her.

"Finally." She remarked coolly, only a hint of a smile on her face. "We've been waiting." She turned then, opening the door for us. We shuffled in, barely taking the time to remove our shoes. Aya was tense beside us and it was more than affecting the rest of us. I felt my throat tighten in apprehension and decided that it would be best to put the box I was carrying down. "Aya-chan?" Manx called out. "They're here." A small figure ventured towards us.

My first thought was that she didn't look very much like Aya. Her long dark hair has been neatly pulled back into two braids and her eyes were wide and worried. She had both hands clasped in front of her as she took a look at all of us. Silence. Very uncomfortable and heavy silence.

"Hello." I started, my mouth forming a reassuring smile. She smiled one of her own, her eyes fastening on to me with hope. The slight tension that had been making her shoulders tight disappeared. "I'm Tsukiyono Omi." I elbowed my silent partner who gifted me with an amethyst glare. "We're so happy to see you're safe." Did I need to elbow him again? Or did I need to make the introductions for everyone? I waited for a second more and then bit my lip to hide a sigh. "Aya-chan, this is…"

"Ran." He finally found his voice. The girl turned from me and looked at the redhead, a pale flush painting her cheeks. The hope in her wide eyes had finally reached the right person.

"Brother?"

"And the rest of the introduction can wait until later." I whispered more to myself than to anyone but Ken, who'd been on my other side, grinned and nodded. He snagged Yoji's sleeve and tugged, leading the older man into a side room. I gratefully followed them and sank into the nearest chair I could find.

"Omi?"

"I'm fine."

_Can't cry it all away_

Manx left us that night without a backward glance. She'd done what she'd come to do. The new Persia had okayed this plan and she had little say apart from that. I tried to picture someone other than Takatori Shuichi as Persia. My uncle. No. Just Persia. He would always be Persia to me. I shook my head and tried to think of something else. Aya-chan's reddened eyes came to me at once. I took a short breath in and let it out again. The rest of the introductions had happened a bit faster than I had expected. She and A-Ran had come in only a couple minutes after they'd left the two alone. Ran had looked even tenser than before if that was even possible and just looking at him made me feel like I was developing an ulcer for sure. Or if I wasn't, I would. And he definitely had to have one unless his stomach was made of stone. Aya-chan had been sniffling, her eyes refusing to look up at us.

A soft knock on my door made me pause as I was putting my computer in place.

"Yes?" I untangled my hands from the wires. The door opened and Ran came in. I stayed silent, simply turning towards him to let him know he was welcomed. I could only hope that the smile on my face gave him some sort of comfort.

"She didn't…she didn't remember." Oh. "You remembered when you saw…" Ran trailed off, awkwardly and I felt my eyes widen. Yes. I had remembered or started to when I saw the face of my brother. Hirofumi. His eyes had been surprisingly gentle behind the wired glasses and the older man had actually cried when he'd taken my shadowed face and recognized me. He'd cried. For me.

"It may take awhile…" I trailed off, my hand had found Ran's sleeve and my fingers had curled around the soft fabric. I sat down on the side of my bed and tugged until he did the same. He'd never taken well to any kind of touch but maybe, maybe now… I rested my head gently on his shoulder. I think I half expected to be pushed aside roughly because when nothing happened, my muscles slowly started to relax. I felt his own mirror mine. "I didn't remember all at once. I still don't remember everything." I offered timidly. He shifted slightly in surprise but said nothing. "When we faced Masafumi in the lab, I didn't know who he was. He meant nothing to me except for what we had learned from Manx. It was only afterwards that the nightmares started and that I felt…"

"You felt?" He asked softly after realizing that I'd grown a bit too silent and that I might not be so comfortable continuing.

"…sorry…" I sighed deeply, one hand coming up to rub at my face. "I felt a doubt. Like he should have meant something. Like that burnt picture I took from the lab meant something. Something important…that it was me being held in that picture." My voice was surprisingly free from any tremor or emotion. "When I saw Hirofumi, I did remember. But I'd already had enough time between the two events that…" That what? I couldn't make any more sense of what had happened beyond that. We stayed most of the night this way, leaning against each other and watching as the shadows surrounding us became more pronounced and more silent.

_Can't scratch it all away…_

To be continued…


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Traumatic retrograde amnesia.

Try the words out one at a time. Try to say them fast, try to say them slow. Try to think of how it rips the lives of those who _do_ remember apart and then think of how hard it is for those who can not remember. Their own mind has turned against them, has betrayed them…and if you can no longer trust yourself, who can you trust?

This world was hell.

There was no one that you could truly trust.

I sighed as I pushed my hair away from my face. It was hot outside, hot inside, and uncomfortable mentally and physically wherever you went. Ran's usually stoic mask was cracked. It was as if the man hadn't put it on right and the pain that was so visible on his face was not really easy to bear on a daily basis. It didn't help that when I did sleep, my nightmares interrupted it. Ken had been right. I wasn't recovered from remembering my own memories. Hell, I had barely begun remembering. I just remembered enough now to know that I didn't want to know more. Sweat trickled down the side of my face and down my neck. I was itching to take my shirt off but was holding back because of Aya-chan. She was somewhere around here and truth be told, I didn't feel that comfortable with her seeing my scars. The girl was very much an innocent and should remain as far away from our night life as she could. If she saw them, she'd have too many questions for which I couldn't answer.

Our current injuries had been explained to her by Manx shortly before we had arrived. I vaguely remember reading an e-mail on what she'd been told. We were Ran's friends and we'd found out she'd been kidnapped and like idiots, we went to save her. End of email. And yes, Manx had used the term idiots.

Aya-chan still couldn't remember anything from her past yet she seemed to blossom under our care with each passing day. She smiled in a way that I couldn't even begin to describe. But I could see its healing effect on everyone but her brother. Ran's guilt seemed never-ending and growing in her presence. It was a relief to know that I could still comfort him better than she could. That her smiles weren't better than mine when it came to him…Am I a shallow person to even feel this way? A snort made its way out of my mouth. I already knew the answer. But how long would it last? How long until she did remember? Or worse how long until it even mattered whether she remembered or not? Everyday the two worked on repairing the sister-brother relationship they had. Once it flowed smoother, once it felt natural to the two of them, Ran wouldn't need me at all. And neither would she. I didn't know how loud my sigh was until I realized that it allowed her to find me in my little hiding spot.

"Omi-kun!" The soft voice was gentle and sweet. And obviously very happy to find me. My guilt rose at its sound.

"Aya-chan," I greeted her as warmly as I could. "How are you?" Which was warm despite of my other feelings. I was torn. I liked Aya-chan. I don't think it was possible not to like her. She was someone you wanted to protect, to laugh with, and play with. She cared.

"Good." She smiled. "A bit hot but…" She trailed off, shrugging her frail shoulders with the air of someone saying 'what can you do?'

"There's a nice breeze here." I moved over on my branch, inviting her to join me if she wished it. I wasn't high into the tree. My shoulder still didn't allow me those kinds of movements. I offered her a hand up which she grasped quickly, trusting me implicitly. "You need to eat more." I told her after a short grunt and hidden gasp of pain as I pulled her up to where I was. She made a face at me before brushing her hands off on her jeans.

"I get enough of that from Ken-kun, thank you very much." She looked around us and gave a happy sigh. "It's nice here." I hummed in assent, grateful that there were many trees around to provide shade. It really was hot outside. We sat there in companionable silence for the longest of times before she timidly pushed my hair out of my face. "How can you still see?" She asked in an amused whisper. "When was the last time you got a haircut?" I pouted, a very useful technique to get out of answering or doing something. Usually. It doesn't work half as well when the other person is used to using pouting to get her way as well. She mirrored my pout with one of her own and we just sat there, pouting at one another until we helplessly started to laugh at the silliness of it all.

"Not fair." I groused. "And it's not that bad." I ran a hand through the golden brown locks only to discover that they now reached my shoulders. When the heck had that happened? Eh…I tried to push it back behind my ears. Now that she'd pointed it out, the length of my hair—especially my bangs—was going to drive me up the wall.

"It's not bad at all." She responded at my aghast expression. "Just long."

"Heh. I must be looking like a younger version of Yoji by now." I exclaimed with a slight groan. "I need to get it cut!" She was startled into a giggle and shook her head. Her expression of light-heartedness didn't last much longer however. She leaned on the main trunk of the tree, her laughter leaving her slowly until her eyes became unfocused.

"He used to make me laugh too…I think." She bit her lip and sighed, turning her face away from me.

_The pain that grips you_

That night, I wasn't surprised when the door opened slightly. Ran slipped in as I rolled over onto my side, leaving him room to join me onto the bed. He did just as quietly. No words were exchanged. There really wasn't any need for them at this point. He simply looped his one arm around my waist, pulling me to him. The shudder that rippled through him went through me as well. I closed my eyes as he hid his face in my neck and ignored the wet warmth that seeped through my hair. I had become his anchor now. But my eyelids were heavy and I had gone for too long without a decent night of sleep. I shifted deeper into the warm embrace, intertwining our hands together until they rested near my cheek. I leaned forward just a bit, brushing my lips against pale long fingers.

"It will get better." I whispered. "It will."

_The fear that binds you_

"And if it doesn't?" If I hadn't physically known that he'd been crying, I wouldn't have been able to tell from his tone of voice. It gave nothing away. It just shifted the air near my ear, causing me to shiver. "What if nothing changes?"

I bit my lip. If nothing changed? It was a cruel question. If nothing changed, Ran would be miserable and so would Aya-chan. But at least I would still have both of them with me. I'd still play a part in their lives. "If nothing changes?" I repeated the question softly, tightening my grip on his one hand. "Everyday the both of you change, little by little. You're both more at ease with each other and even if she should never remember her memories, Ran…" I moved inside our embrace until I was facing him. His eyes had widened, we'd never done this before. We'd never looked at each other when he'd come seeking comfort or reassurance. It wasn't part of our silent arrangement. Facing each other made it more real, I suppose. "Your love for her and her's for you is not going to be affected by that." I wanted him to hear the truth of that. I wanted to be certain that he listened to the words I was saying. He looked away, nodding slightly.

"It's strange…" He started slowly.

"What is?" I had closed my eyes again, turning my back on him once more. I hadn't been any more comfortable with the previous position as he had been. I tugged his one arm back over me.

"…hearing you call me by my given name." It was a good thing I'd already turned away. My eyes shot open at those words and the ache within me grew.

"I'm sorry Aya-kun." I tripped over his name. "It gets a little confusing." He didn't say anything at all. Simply held on to me for an hour or two more and then he left me alone in the darkness. I'd been his anchor long enough for him to regain his composure and the strength needed to continue down this path. An hour or two in my presence, for someone like Aya-Ran-whatever, who always stood alone… I closed my eyes. There was enough darkness within me; I didn't need to see anymore.

_Releases life in me_

"You look tired Omi." Yoji commented the next morning as he sipped his coffee. I spared him a glance, smile in place.

"Do I?" I asked as if I hadn't noticed the growing shadows under my own eyes for the past week. Ran threw me a startled look, suddenly trying to assess my status.

"You do look tired." Aya-chan chirped worriedly. "Have you not been sleeping well?"

"I've been sleeping fine." I drawled the words out. "We're out of cereal and we're low on fruits. I'm gonna go downtown today. Do we need anything else?" No one answered as Ken made his way into the kitchen looking a little worse for wear as well. Though he usually does before getting around to drinking his first cup of coffee. He scowled at no one in particular before plopping down at the kitchen table with a groan. "Ken-kun! Are _you_ ok?" I exclaimed making me way over to him.

"I'm bo-ored!" He grunted, his head hidden in his outstretched arms. "I'm so bored that I can't sleep anymore! Can we please get a tv? A soccer ball? Anything?"

"Are you serious, Hidaka?" Ah the Ran we were all used to came to the forefront, his one eyebrow arched high in his forehead. It was so reminiscent of the face we were used to seeing when we would slack off at the flower shop. He stuck a finger at his temple, massaging the area there as if he had a headache. "Omi—let this useless mass go and get the groceries. Take a nap instead."

"But I…" I started helplessly. I needed to go downtown for more than just groceries. Aya-chan had confessed to being scared of the darkness. I needed to buy her a nightlight. Ken's eyes seemed to reflect my own dismay. "I wanted to go." Yoji looked ay me and shook his head.

"Both of you go. Get the jock out of the house and then come back here and take a nap. You need one."

"Eh?" Ken lifted his head, eyeing me worriedly. I could hear the words before they even left his mouth.

"I'm fine!" I snapped finally. Aya-chan took a step back at my tone, which I'd never used in front of her. I'd hardly ever used it with the guys either unless they'd done something incredibly stupid during a mission or if they were fighting with each other—seriously. I felt bad immediately, she hadn't deserved any of it. She'd just been watching all of us interact, head swinging to whoever was talking. "Sorry. Its just…lay off a bit. I'm not a kid anymore. I know my own limits." And I passed them awhile back and none of you cared then so why care now? Why ask me now? Why?

Yoji's eyebrows nearly disappeared to his hairline they were so high. "Kid…" He bit off the word hastily as if he'd just realized what he'd spoken. "We didn't mean to…" He sighed a bit shakily and abruptly looked away from me and back to Aya-chan. "Don't mind us, we're not used to being together 24-7. It's a guy thing." He gave her a cheeky grin and went back to sipping his coffee. A guy thing? Ken and Ran fighting it out in the flower shop when they'd barely known each other—that was a guy thing. That was a pure unadulterated pissing contest to see who would be the alpha male. But this? I started to laugh weakly. And then I couldn't stop. I fell into my chair a bit helplessly, hands covering my face as the laughter spilled out of my mouth. God, it wouldn't stop. Make it stop.

I didn't see as they glanced over me, communicating in that nonverbal way all assassins or soldiers who have worked together do. I didn't even hear as Ran and Aya-chan left the kitchen. I did feel Ken moving away from the table.

"ok-ay," He whispered. "Omi…?"

"Shut-up Ken." Yoji muttered wisely. "Let him laugh. It'll be good for him."

"Really?" The slightly hysterical tone in Ken's voice did little to calm my own down. "I mean cause…its not normal Omi laughter."

"Ken. Shut. Up."

To be continued...


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

In the end, I reached out to Manx and Kritiker. I managed to lose Ken in the grocery store after having made it clear to him that he needed to get Aya-chan a nightlight along with a promise that he couldn't tease the girl.

"Bombay?" Manx's voice was surprised to say the least. I'd punched in the number for the secure line.

"Manx." Help me. "I'm" Trapped. "Functional." Between two worlds. "Ready to go back to work." That cannot co-exist. That couldn't co-exist.

"Understood." There was a slight pause in which I could only hear my heartbeat pounding in my chest. "The others?" She may have had to repeat herself twice as the blood roared in my ears.

"No." I whispered. "Not ready." I took a deep breath in. "Solo." Please. The next pause was longer.

"…understood." I moved to hang up. "Bom—" I slammed the phone into my ear in my haste to correct myself and winced at the sharp pain. "—glad to have you back." And then the dial tone. I stared emptily ahead of me.

And smiled.

_In our mutual shame_

Ran didn't come that night. I stared up at my ceiling and watched the minute changes of light play patterns on it. I heard the old house creak and groan as the humidity in air changed as well. I wouldn't say I was waiting for him to come because I knew he wouldn't. The redhead was probably blaming himself for the fact that I looked tired and was probably cutting himself away from me as fast as he could to correct himself.

Don't get attached Omi.

Persia had told me that before sending me off to start Weiss.

Don't get attached.

I was a boy. I'd lost everything and been adopted into a secret corporation with only a shadowed and weary voice to guide my footsteps. Don't. I blinked. Get. Swoosh. Attached. The creaking of the house was too similar to another noise that haunted me.

I was restless and exhausted. A deadly combination for cooking up a healthy batch of insomnia. I got up and stretched. I hadn't been training properly these past weeks and my body, lean to begin with, showed it. I bit off a sigh. I had twisted the truth in telling Manx that I was mission ready. I just needed a couple days to get back into shape. I could start now. Sleep wouldn't be courting me tonight whatever was left of it. Mind made up, I haunted the hallways making my steps extra quiet. I counted them, knowing how many it would take before reaching that one part of the hallway that made enough noise to wake the dead. I avoided it carefully and continued until I was outside. I breathed in the fresh air and glanced up at the sky.

In the city, the lights always got in the way of properly seeing the stars. Here it didn't. It made me feel humble and small. I looked away and went through the motions of my training that had been drilled into me so many times it had become a habit—easy to fall back into—ignoring my body as it protested.

Hours later, I tumbled back into my bed just as the others were starting to wake up. I closed my eyes. Only for a couple of minutes, I promised myself. I was wet with sweat, my t-shirt plastered onto me like a second skin. I most likely smelled…I. Just. Only a couple of minutes.

_We idolize_

A soft hand was pushing my hair away from my face. The way they had entered in my room had alerted my senses and started to bring me back into awareness. But that soft movement, the recognition of the smell, and the obvious fact that they weren't hiding themselves was shushing me back into oblivion where it was safe. Where I was safe. The fingers were moving down, soothing my skin on their way. The mattress near my head moved slightly, telling me all that I needed to know without having to open my eyes or waking up.

Whoever it was, their head was now resting near mine. And they were humming. I frowned and the humming softened. The fingers started to move again, slowly. Relaxing. I buried my head deeper into the pillow. I didn't want to wake up.

I didn't.

_To blind them from the truth_

Three men were staring at me. Two with hardened eyes, gazing up and down my bound body to see what value I still could possibly hold for them. The third was showing fear. His eyes showed white, his breathing was irregular and he stank. The words he'd shouted into the darkened room had meant nothing to me. "Did you hear what I said?" He yelled again.

"We heard you." The first started slowly, sounding almost bored. I fought a whimper as he took a step forward. A rough finger trailed down my cheek to the gag that had been fitted into my mouth when I'd started to cry. The finger brushed against my lips and then stopped at the end of my chin. He forced my head up in one quick jerk. No. no. no. "Did you hear?" The smile that pulled his lips apart scared me. No. no. no. "Did you little one?" He gave a rough laugh. "Your daddy's not gonna pay for you." No. no. what? Da—no. no. "What to do with you now?" The hand dropped away. The man became blurry before me. "Awh. I think the kid finally heard us. He's crying…" So blurry. So…it was Persia. Persia was pushing me forward, making me run. I didn't need to be told twice. The bonds around me had been cut loose. The only one that remained was around my wrist, flying behind me as I ran out ahead of the older man. I ignored the cries for me to slow down. I even ignored the burning sensation of my lungs as I tried to gasp at whatever air could flow in me.

It wasn't safe still. He-no- that man had shot the others. Blang! Blang! Blang! Three loud shots, still echoing in my ears. It was all I could hear! And there had been blood flying everywhere. And it had been warm as it splattered on me. So warm. It wasn't safe here. I want my mother. I want to be with her. She would make it all right. She always did. Even when Masafumi hurt me and killed my pets. She always—the door slammed open. The first thing I saw was darkness and then white. White feet. But that was where my face was. They were floating? I looked up and my mouth opened. "Mommy?" She was flying. "Mommy…" The relief that flooded in my system stopped, confused. Heart pounding. "Mommy." Why wasn't she responding to me? Why wasn't she coming back down and holding me? Loud footsteps suddenly came to a halt and there was a gagging noise. A hand slapped my face, covering my eyes, blocking her from view. I was being dragged away. No! No! That was my mom! That was my safety. "MOMMY!" I tried to fight but I was too small and the man was too big. "NO! MOMMY! MOMMY!" She continued to fly in the room. Weightless, like an angel.

"Omi!" Hands grabbed at my shoulder. I snarled wordlessly, my muscles tensing, ready to make my move.

"No Aya-chan don't—" A door was being slammed open. I wouldn't be dragged away. I wasn't helpless. I shoved hard, blind at whoever was holding me. The weight on my body flew away. The body had been soft and warm and… "Shit!" There was a gasp; the breath had been knocked out of them. Good. It was still dark. Did they blindfold me this time as well?

"Get him!"

"Omi wake up!" Another hand. Another person to drag me away. No! no! Get away! My fingers wrapped around cold metal. "He sleeps with them? Fuck! Fuck!" Tackled. Suddenly pinned down. Pain exploded in my chest and in my shoulder. Trapped!

"Watch it Ken!" Ken? Ken…My eyes snapped open. That's why it had been dark. My mind had released me. W-what? I couldn't breathe. My cheeks were wet. What was happening?

"You're hurting him!" Aya-chan shrieked. Aya-chan. She'd been…she was…oh god. I wanted to throw up. I struggled and then stopped, letting myself go limp. Ken felt the change in my body instantly and looked up at my face, not letting me go as he did so. "Get off him!"

"You're awake." Ken remarked dryly. His lip was bloody. "Can I let go?" I nodded briskly, swallowing hard. He released my one hand carefully, watching it like a hawk. When I remained where I was, panting, he let go of the rest of me, rolling off of me in one fluid motion.

"What were you doing here?" Ran hissed in the background. "What were you thinking?"

"I was checking up on him! He was…"

"Chill Ran." Yoji muttered. "He had a nightmare. Aya-chan's not hurt. It's ok. It's over."

"It could have not been ok." The taller man ground out.

"What did I do?" I sat up slowly, eyes wide. "Aya-chan, I'm sorry. Aya…" I looked at him. "I mean…Ran…I'm so sorry." The redhead wrapped a protective arm around his sister, eyes glaring. He said nothing. "I…"

"For Christ sakes it was a goddamn nightmare!" Ken snapped. "You don't have to bloody apologize." He wiped his lip on his sleeve and grimaced. "It could've happened to any one of us." I heard his words, jumped at their loudness, but my eyes never wavered as they held Ran's glare. It didn't soften one bit. But he let his sister go when she tugged out of his arms. And then I was being engulfed in her arms. Being soothed, being comforted… and still I stared.

_That finds a way from who we are_

"What was it about?" We were all outside, sitting on the porch. Well, Aya-chan and Ran weren't there. Ran was looking over Aya-chan's set of bruises. He hadn't managed to catch her before she hit the wall. Ken's voice was intrusive despite the worried tone. I looked down at the ground.

"My mother." I answered finally. I'd been crying for her out loud in my sleep so it wasn't really telling them anything new. "I was just remembering her."

"Jeez kid. Was she like your brother or something? Cause that was a bad—" I'd stood up without realizing it and Yoji waved his hands in the air to pacify me or to get ready to pin me down, I didn't know.

"She wasn't _anything_ like them. She wasn't…" My voice caught in my throat. "I don't want to talk about this." The two were quiet. "I haven't had nightmares in awhile." It wasn't quite a big lie. With Ran visiting during the night, I usually never slept because well…who slept when someone was crying or talking next to you? "It caught me off guard." The door behind us slid open. "It won't happen again."

"What are you going to do? Not sleep?" Yoji asked, ignoring the two who entered the conversation.

"Don't be stupid." I muttered. "Of course I'll sleep." I'll just make sure to lock the door to my room. Make a big- DON'T ENTER. DANGEROUS WHEN ASLEEP-MAY BITE sign and post it on the wall.

"Are you feeling better, Omi-kun?" Aya-chan's hand pressed into mine. I looked up startled.

"Yes. You?" She gave me a bright smile and nodded.

"I'm tougher than I look, ne brother of mine?" The last she directed towards a brooding Ran. I sighed.

"I'm really sorry."

"O-m-i." She stressed my name out. "It's fine. I'm fine." No it wasn't. But…

"Maybe I should go back with Manx the next time she comes to visit us." She was coming the day after tomorrow. Not that the others knew. Ran's head finally snapped up, his eyes clearing.

"Why?" Aya-chan looked aghast at the suggestion. Why? Cause I nearly flattened you while I was having a nightmare, cause I'm a dreadful Taketori that nearly hurt you again…and because it was killing me to be here. "Not because of this… I don't want you to go."

"Stay Omi." Ran hissed the words out. Interestingly enough, Yoji and Ken stayed quiet.

To be continued...


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

It was evening and I was sitting in front of the computer screen, mindlessly clicking away when he came in. I hadn't yet locked my door, thinking that if I did it too early and someone did come around, they would become suspicious. I needed to act normal above all. He shut the door behind him and leaned on the wall, expression blank.

"…" I turned to face him. "I'm sorry about today. I wouldn't hurt her." I wasn't in my right mind. I was hurting and afraid and…

"I know."

"Let me go back with Manx. I'm not helping the situation here. You'll be fine with just Ken and Yoji."

"No." His arms tightened across his chest. He was glaring at the floor.

"No?"

"She told me that she remembered little things. That you made her laugh like I used too…that you…" He trailed off, swallowing hard. "You have to stay. You make her feel comfortable. You understand her…" And me? I nodded dumbly. What about me?

"If that's what you want…" Amethyst eyes looked me over sharply.

"It's what I want." I turned away from him and blinked at the computer screen. It was suddenly too bright for me to stare at and I turned it off. I fiddled with a book that was on my desk and the silence had gone so long unbroken that I thought he'd left. He was so freaking quiet that it was possible that I could have missed hearing his footsteps moving away from my room.

When he finally eased himself from his position from the wall to sit on the bed, I jumped from my chair. My knee slammed onto the bottom of the desk and I cursed as pain shot up and down my leg. "Why are you still here?" I muttered, grimacing and rubbing the top of my knee a bit more viciously than normal.

"Did I keep the nightmares away?"

_Please don't be afraid_

Was it possible for someone to make you feel like you're suddenly drowning?

_When the darkness fades away_

"W-what?" I stammered caught off-guard.

"I can stay here, if it helps." I can't sleep when you're here. I blinked at him. "Omi?" I looked into his eyes trying to understand. It sort of clicked a second later. He thought he needed me for Aya-chan's sake so it stood to reason that he needed me at my best for her sake as well. It was as simple as that. And if sleeping here lessened the risk of nightmares and increased the chance that I slept… would that overcome the mistake he'd thought he'd made only a couple days ago when I'd simply looked tired? Persia's voice whispered to me… Don't get attached.

An empty smile reached my lips.

"Don't worry about it. The nightmares don't come that often." Liar. I forced my fingers to stop rubbing my aching knee. "Thank you though." He kept staring as if trying to spot the lie. Too bad he hadn't met me a couple years earlier. I couldn't lie for a damn before I joined Kritiker. And now? I looked at him innocently with an expression mixed with the right touch of gratitude and exasperation. "It was just one nightmare A-aya-kun. In the whole time that we've been here, just one."

"It is confusing." He started.

"Eh?"

"My name." He glanced away. "Ran is fine, Omi." Oh that. Well, ok. Could've said so earlier. Awkward silence filled the air.

"Go to bed Ran-kun." I muttered. "I want to go to sleep." Not really. The white bare feet were still dancing in the air whenever I closed my eyes. The redhead simply lay down on my bed. I glared at him and then sighed. Oh what the hell. In two more days, Manx would be here. I'd hopefully have a solo mission that would help me clear my head. I took a cautious step toward the bed.

I was a bit wary of him. After all, I had slammed his sister into a wall only a couple of hours ago and Ran had a temper that could rival a dragon's. I was wary of myself. Wary of craving that warmth. Wary of becoming attached. More so than I already was. I caught his eyes with mine again as I placed my first hand on the bed. "That's not what I had meant." I whispered. He didn't respond, just moved so he could be in a more comfortable position. I lay down, my back to him. Don't touch me. The weight shifted behind me, the mattress dipping. Don't. I tensed. Touch. More shifting. Me.

There was a simple warmth radiating from his presence into my back but nothing else.

"I didn't know she was afraid of the dark." He whispered silently. "When did she…?"

"A couple days ago."

"Thank you for the nightlight."

"You're welcome."

_The dawn will break the silence_

I woke up and found myself looking at a mouth. A very close-to-my-face mouth. I jerked my head away and realized belatedly that the mouth was attached to a pale face that was very much awake. Shit. Whatever sleepiness that had been still residing within me dissipated with a wave of heart pounding adrenaline. I promptly fell off the bed and rolled back onto my feet, getting back into a fighting stance as if it was a second skin. Amethyst eyes widened as Ran pulled himself up onto one elbow to get a better look at me. I must have been a pretty silly sight, my longer hair all messed up from sleep and well… I didn't have a mirror. Ran would probably provide a better description of me at this point. I pouted as I straightened up with as much dignity as I could pull off at this point. Which wasn't much.

"Owwie!"

He actually didn't need to say anything to get his point across to me. A smile was quirking his lips up and he actually fell back onto his back.

"It's not funny!" My pout grew. "You just gave me a heart attack!" Not to mention a couple new bruises.

"I" Ran stressed the word out. "Did nothing." He gave me a side glance and his smile grew.

"Mou!" I flapped my hands at him, out of sorts already this early in the morning. It was not the best way to wake up. My hand twitched as I rested it on my chest. "How long have you been up anyway?"

"Not that long." His voice was quiet. "I'm glad you were able to sleep."

"…yeah…thank you." He didn't acknowledge my words, just took his leave as silently as he'd come in. I sat down on my computer chair and gazed at my empty bed. Had this really happened? Had Ran really been here at all? The whole scene had seemed so unreal. I'd never made him smile like that…I'd never seen him smile like that. The rumpled sheets could have just been messed by me alone. There was no evidence of his presence anymore. None.

And despite the warmth, I felt cold.

_Screaming in our hearts_

I rubbed my face a couple of times, wondering whether the rest of the day was going to remain surreal. I got up and made my way downstairs. I was pleasantly surprised to find the kitchen empty. I needed to be doing something with my hands at this time and making breakfast would be just the thing. I put my entire focus on the task, ignoring the little noises in the house letting me know everyone was waking up. The shower running, Ken's humming, Yoji's inarticulate grumble as he realized the two bathrooms were already occupied—the noises were comforting, not intrusive.

By the time I had finished setting the table, the smell of fresh coffee was reeling Yoji in here despite the fact that neither of the bathrooms had been freed for his use. Ah well. Assassins had long ago learned how to hold it. You couldn't exactly pause a mission because of needing to go to the bathroom.

"Kid." He greeted. "You look better." He took the mug I offered him with a smile. "And I swear to god, if you'd been born the other sex…hmm-mmm." He tousled my hair, his smile turning slightly lecherous. I ducked his hand and made a face. "It'd be love, kid. It'd be love."

"I'm not a kid, Yoji!" I played the part, falling back into the comfortable bickering Yoji and I had always shared. The silly and definitely not serious flirting had its usual effect on me—a blush painted my cheeks as I started to stammer and become flustered. I pushed him away, forcing him to take a seat at the table. "You're impossible!" He waggled his eyebrows at me. "Stop that!" It was a relief to play with the older man. He'd been so quiet throughout our recovery and I'd been at a loss of what to do. He made a grab for me and managed to get a hold of the end of my sleeve. He pulled me over to him with one hard tug, settling me onto his knee. "Yoji!" My voice definitely cracked as I hit a pitch a bit too high for me to reach at my age. "Y-you you're worse than impossible! What are you doing?!"

"Enjoying the sight of one of your true smiles." I froze and then relaxed against him. "It's been too long."

"Heh." I tucked my head under Yoji's chin and sent another wordless thanks to Ken. With everyone seemingly needing this sort of touch from me…this proximity was actually comfortable. "I missed you as well."

"Touche." He admitted knowing what I was talking about without any need of an explanation. I wrinkled my nose in slight disgust as he took a huge swallow of his coffee. I felt it go down! Heard it too. He chuckled and poked me with his free hand before sighing. I looked up at the sound, watching as his green eyes lost their mischief and became distant. A touch sad. "How long do you think we'll be allowed to stay here, like this?"

"As long as it takes." I whispered.

"Are we interrupting anything?" Ran's voice came from what felt like bloody no where! I shot out of Yoji's arms and nearly found myself sprawled on the floor _again_! Aya-chan peeked a look above her brother's shoulder, her cheeks brightly red. I'm sure mine were going to match hers if they didn't already.

"Ra-an!" She hissed. "That was…"

"What are we interrupting?" Ken asked. "And why are we all standing in the doorway. I smell a yummy breakfast. You're all blocking the way!"

"Nothing!" Aya-chan squeaked and jumped forward, sliding into her chair without looking at Yoji or me. "Nothing at all." Yoji started to laugh.

"You're not helping things!" I swatted at his head. "Aya-chan…" I started. "Yoji is _the_ womanizer."

"And the kid is," Yoji picked up my line of reasoning ducking his head slightly. He avoided being smacked by a mere millimeter. "very sadly, not a woman. Though he'd make a cute one, ne?" He chuckled again, shaking his head. "Ah. It's like we've had this particular conversation two times this morning."

"We have!" I gritted out. "And I'm grateful for being a man!" Ken grinned, relief lightening his eyes.

"Oh Aya-chan, enjoy this. It's a real treat this early in the morning." Ran snorted at this brash announcement.

"Ken!" I snapped, betrayed. Aya-chan giggled and then covered her mouth in surprise. "You're supposed to be on my side." When he reached for one of the plates I had filled, I slapped his hand away and offered it to Ran instead, who had remained apart from us. He accepted it silently after a moment, taking his place next to his sister. Ken moaned the unfairness. Yoji wisely sipped his coffee. Ran started to eat, slowly. And if I closed my eyes and just listened. Just listened, I could imagine that we were in the flower shop once more. I could almost smell the different flowers…hear Momo-san speaking softly to her cat as she watched us work away.

The others had lost a safe house. A temporary arrangement until they paid their dues to Kritiker and managed to find a way back into society and normal living. I'd lost my only home. I'd naively begun to think of it as just that. Home.

But assassins don't have homes.

"Omi?" Aya-chan started causing me to open my eyes. I felt my cheeks flush. Caught daydreaming like that. "Aren't you hungry?" What would the others think? My stomach tightened.

"Hm." I grabbed my plate from the counter, double checked the stove to make sure I'd turned everything off before taking my place at the table. In any case, it gave me enough time to regain my composure and realize once again how fragile human emotions truly are.

To be continued…


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I practiced again hiding in the forest as evening fell. Since I had cooked in the morning, I was excused from chores the rest of the day. The others would call me when dinner was ready. My muscles were already looser than they had been the first time, a bit sore, but that was easily ignored. It felt good in a way to do something that was second nature to me now. Punch. Dodge. Kick. Turn around. Guard. Punch… The katas were fluid movements blending all into one. The punches had enough strength to kill someone if placed just right. The next move and my invisible opponent would have had his eyes gauged out.

Sweat trickled down my brow. I took a breath in. Another punch. Dodge. Kick. Guard. Guard. Back to initial position. I bowed my head. Only then did I bring my hand to wipe the sweat away. I needed to practice my aim, see how much I had lost in that area in the weeks where we'd been simply recovering. My hands were already itching to feel the metal of my darts.

The soft rustling of leaves being stepped on made me look up. Ran stepped from behind a tree, looking equally startled to find me.

"Omi." He greeted finally, amethyst eyes looking me over.

"Ran-kun," I forced a smile and dropped the stance all together. "It helps me sleep." I offered weakly. He nodded. "I've been careful. She's never seen me practice." Of the two times I'd done it. I bit off a sigh while again he simply nodded. "A-uhm-are you taking a walk?"

"I was." Another trickle of sweat was making its way down my face and down my neck. I should have brought a towel.

"Do you want company?" I asked without any thought at all. "I need to cool down before I go back in and…"

"You're free to do as you please." I sighed at the vague response. It wasn't the most inviting thing. I turned to look back at where he'd come from. Somewhere, past the trees and other green foliage, our safe house was probably lit. Aya-chan and Ken would be cooking something, most likely teasing one another with an inherent ease. Ken made a lot of things look easy. I wondered what Yoji would be doing; perhaps smoking outside looking to the sky as the stars started to slowly make their appearance.

I let Ran walk away from me without another word.

_My love for you still grows_

Night came too soon, ending a day which probably had the most _normal_ qualities than all the rest that had previously past between all of us. I sank into my bed, wishing the darkness would melt away. Ran entered minutes behind me, a silent shadow. I closed my eyes. The mattress shifted underneath me and a tentative arm came to surround me. I forced myself to relax and allowed him to pull me to him. How had this worked last night? Had we both been so exhausted that it just hadn't mattered that we'd been in each other's presence during our most vulnerable state—sleeping?

I think it was a long time before either of us actually fell asleep.

_This I do for you_

Today was the day, morning having passed by like a nondescript blur.

I glanced at the clock again, fidgeting slightly before turning my eyes back onto the game board that Ken had brought back from the market yesterday along with a television, a soccer ball and other odd things he claimed would be fun to do all together. Yoji had announced that he'd rather be dead than be caught playing soccer or twister and had escaped to his room. But that was all yesterday…Aya-chan, and I was almost positive that Ken had put her up to the task, had managed to get all of us to agree on playing one thing all together at least once a day.

We were playing Jinsei Game, also known as the Life Game, the least torturous of the options Ken had brought back with him. Aya-chan had just gotten married and Ken was squinting at the fine print on the box as he tried to figure out how big of a gift each of us owed the girl. Ran's face was an interesting mix of stifled emotions as he sat there. I'm not sure if it was due to the fact that we were actually all playing or whether it was due to his baby sister getting married—play or not it was apparently the type of thing older brothers are wary of. She smiled at Yoji when he asked to who it would be, shaking her head in shy refusal to divulge that sort of information.

"But that's the only fun part of this game!" Yoji half-whined, half-sighed. "You're supposed to tell who you're getting married to and name your children!" I blinked at that. It was the first time I had played and I really _really_ hoped that we didn't have to do all of what Yoji was saying. It just seemed very weird and personal and who the heck would think of this kind of game anyway. Ken frowned, lowering the box slightly.

"I never played it like that." He muttered. "And it's not written in the rules that we have to."

"Shut-up Ken." Yoji made a shoo-ing motion towards him. "I wasn't expecting your Neanderthal ways to be that evolved in imagination and creativity anyway." Ran shook his head at the comment while Aya-chan started to laugh.

"Neander-what?!" Ken growled.

"Maa," I started reaching for Ken, hand coming to grip his upper arm. I should never have let those two sit next to each other. I should have sat in between them instead of in between Ran and Ken. "Its Aya-chan's wedding. Let's just find out how much we pay her and continue with the game, ok?"

"Oh and that's very romantic, kid." Yoji sighed. "Very romantic."

"It's a game Yoji!" I moaned. And it was starting to look like it would be the longest game of Jinsei ever at the rate we were going. "What does romance have anything t-" The rest of my words were muffled as Ran placed his hand over my mouth. The simple touch stopped me cold, my eyes widening. My hold on Ken dropped away immediately. Ken also froze where he was, looking between the two of us in surprise.

Ran never touched any of us unless it was for an actual purpose; holding us back during a mission, helping us carry heavy stuff at the Koneko, helping with injuries. That sort of stuff. The others didn't know about the night visits or anything. Ran had never acted any differently towards me during the day. They… Ken smirked finally, looking relieved. Relieved? Relieved?! I blinked. My heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest! Yoji was arching his eyebrows at the scene. He made no comment however, simply leaning his chin on his hand, a slight frown pinching his features.

"Don't get him started, please." The redhead asked in a serious tone. I nodded slowly and he removed his hand. "What did the rules say Hidaka?"

"Uhm oh yeah. Aya-chan you're supposed to spin again…"

"You're really not going to tell us?" Yoji asked after he had given a minute shake of his head.

"It's a secret." Aya-chan's smile was bright. "I got a ten!" Ken peeked at the box again and groaned.

"Get ready to pay up guys." He muttered his hands reaching for the brightly colored fake yen. The game went on for a couple more minutes with Yoji becoming a doctor finally—he was the last to graduate from school— and Ken finding a lost treasure before I suddenly tensed. Beside me I felt Ran and Ken do the same. I looked up and found the reason why too soon. Manx walked into the room as if it was her right. I wondered if she owned a key to this damn place. It made me leery. The thought that there was another copy somewhere out there even if she was the only one to have it. It made the risk of a security breach that much greater. The breath I had been holding inside was let loose. That woman I swear…

She stopped, taking in the sight of all five of us sitting around the small table in the living room playing a board game. It was a rare thing indeed. A small smile lifted her lips. No doubt she'd have some interesting comments to make at a later date.

"Jinsei?" She asked. Aya-chan gave a little surprised yelp. She was the only one who hadn't heard the other come in. But when she realized who it was a look of happiness replaced the startlement.

"Manx-san!" She got up to give her a warmer welcome. Aya-chan truly enjoyed the older woman's company. After all, the woman had been one of the first people she'd seen when she'd awakened. She'd also been the one to bring her back to her brother. Aya-chan didn't know what Manx represented for the rest of us. A frizzled tape with blank manila envelopes, a mission in the dead of the night, information concerning our past, current, and night lives. Ran stayed tense, amethyst eyes glaring at the woman like she was a personal affront. "How are you? We've only gotten started. You could still join us…" The redhead laughed at the girl's enthusiasm and shook her head even as Yoji got up, no doubt to get an extra chair or offer his. His movements were slow though and he had a strained look about him.

"I'd love to but I'm only passing by. I wanted to check in on everyone." She came closer, allowing the girl to pull her towards us. Manx's eyes caught mine for a just a second. I knew that she had found a job for me right then. I gave a slight nod.

"I'll go get some drinks." I offered.

"You have time for that at least, ne?" Aya-chan asked. The woman inclined her head to the side as if she was giving it some thought before she nodded.

"That would be nice. Do you need a hand Omi?" She asked. I had three pair of eyes turn to me at once. I took a step back. This was awkward. What the hell was I supposed to do now? Yes and have her with me to get the information needed but have the other be suspicious and on my case or no and lose the opportunity. "Yoji here seems like he's ready to help in any case." Manx threw the older man a smile which Yoji gallantly returned with a wink. The two of us headed for the kitchen.

"Did you know she was coming?" Yoji asked. I shook my head silently. Did it still count as lie when I hadn't even spoken? The man sighed. "I wonder what she wants."

"A status check probably."

_Before I try to fight the truth my final time_

It was just as we were making our way back towards the living room with two trays— one filled with snacks and the other with drinks—that Aya-chan came running past us, climbing the stairs without a word. It made the both of us pause in our footing exchanging wary glances. What had happened? Had Manx done or said something to trigger this? I fidgeted where I stood, feeling torn about rejoining the others in the living room and following Ran's sister. Who needed me more? And what of the mission?

The older man must have seen something of the internal debate I was going through even if he didn't understand or know about all the pieces causing it. Yoji nodded without me needing to say anything and soon he walked past me taking the decision out of my hands. I placed my tray on the ground nearest to the wall before following the path Aya-chan had taken. The others knew better than to run in the hallway in any case.

Her bedroom door was closed but there was sound coming from behind it. "Aya-chan?" I asked, knocking carefully. She opened the door, peering at me with teary eyes. "What happened?" The door was opened a bit more, inviting me to step in.

"Manx-san," She started slowly, one hand rising up to angrily brush away at the wetness. "She brought me something." Aya-chan sniffled and closed the door behind us. "It was a photo-album of…of my parents and she had newspaper…clippings…" Oh. God. "Did you know?" Her eyes captured my own as I felt bile rise to my throat. "Did you know that they were…" The word couldn't escape her mouth. Fresh tears welled up in those wide eyes and I could only stare in growing dismay.

Yes. Yes I had known.

I hadn't known that Ran was keeping it from her though.

"Why would he keep something like that from me?" She asked and it was painful to hear her verbalizing my own thoughts and confusion. "I know I can't remember them. I can barely remember him! But…" Her words were choked and her breath was shallow, rattling through her lungs and back out again. "It was my right to know…isn't it? Why couldn't I have learned it from him?"

I don't know.

"Omi…" She reached out then, hands grabbing at my shirt. The movement was so basic—a need for protection, for shelter, for warmth and for comfort—I wrapped my arms around her. It was all I could do as the words stayed stuck within me. And it was that small movement that caused the dam to break. Hot tears were suddenly rolling down her cheeks and onto my shoulder.

I'm so sorry.

"Why," Her sobbed words were barely understandable. "couldn't you…" All my senses strained to hear them. Years of training does not allow for breaks no matter how you wish you could simply turn them off. "…be him?"

…

I knew I had guessed correctly when I saw that the door to my room was opened slightly. I always closed it, knowing that the others valued privacy too highly to go in without my permission. We trusted each other implicitly. But some barriers had been broken since we'd come to this house. Maybe broken was too strong a word. We'd bent them beyond repair… Ran. I slipped into my own room and closed the door behind me a bit too forcefully and the slamming of it physically traveled up my arm. Of course he'd be here working whatever he needed to work out in my room.

Ken and Yoji had replaced me upstairs. They'd cajoled Aya-chan into agreeing to go into town. They were going to get ice cream or something. Blood pounding in my ears as well as the lingering sound of Aya-chan's silent crying still followed me into my room. It was almost like I'd never left her side at all.

Her large wide eyes had called out to me when the other two had come in with their plans. Her hands had tightened their hold on me. And I'd been lost once more. She had let go though with Ken's incessant yet gentle prodding, taking his own instead. The brunet knew…

I'd all but run out of the room to go find the other half of this Fujimaya equation. And here he was. Sitting on the side of my bed. Just sitting there. Staring. Near his foot lay the photo album. I don't know who I was more angry with. Manx for meddling or Ran for his secretive and damned quiet ways.

"What were you _thinking_?!" I hissed, eyes coming to focus on his subdued form immediately. "How could you keep that from her?" My only answer was the slight shake of his head. "We all thought," The forming of fists as his long pale fingers curled together. "…that you had told her…that you had explained things to her and that's why she didn't have more questions!" Damn it. Look at me. "She did have questions." I told you that the questions, that the not knowing was the worst. How could you? After all that… How could you still? I wanted to scream instead of continuing in this way. "She did!" But there were still roles to play. Unbidden the image of Persia pushing me away came to me. "You never answered them." He'd always pushed me away. Pushed aside my questions, my fears, my nightmares like they were all meaningless in the grand scheme of things. Maybe they were…they probably still are. But damn it! I grabbed his shoulder and yanked. It wasn't supposed to be like this with them. Not with her. Not with him. "Why?" Blank amethyst eyes looked back at me.

"I," His voice was bleak. "I couldn't…I didn't know how."

Traumatic…

"I didn't want her to know."

Retrograde.

"I didn't want her to hurt…"

Amnesia…

"I…" The rest was muffled as I laced my arms around him from behind and my face coming to rest in the crook where his neck met his shoulder.

Like he hurt everyday no doubt. Hurting inside with the memories he had no one to share with. His whispered words had struck something within me and for a mere second, the thought came to me that Ran had never grieved the loss of his parents. He'd never taken the time to realize, apart from the obvious physical fact, that they were indeed dead. He'd focused so much of his energy on Aya-chan, on getting her revenged, on getting her proper care that—it—The moment of insight was gone as he shuddered in the embrace.

"Idiot! Idiot…" I wanted to cry. And I couldn't. He needed to cry. And he couldn't. It wasn't night out. It wasn't dark enough to hide the evidence.

It wouldn't be for hours yet.

Neatly placed in the scattered mess of his room, looking inconspicuous, a cd lay on top of the papers and books strewn on the desk where it hadn't been before.

To be continued…

A/N- I'm really sorry it's taken me so long to write this next chapter. I'm having a bit of a hard time and I do hope you'll forgive me. The first five and ½ chapters came to me in one night. The rest is playing out very nicely in my head but evades me the minute I come near my computer. Shakes head. In any case…I hope it's still ok and thank you so much for all of the support you guys have shown me. The feedback has been greatly appreciated.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_Omi knew he wasn't supposed to be where he was, hiding in the cubby near Persia's desk. But it was quiet and dark in here and he felt safe in the enclosed space. There was no one there to stare or comment wondering who he was and why he was here. It scared him those questions and the number of nameless faces he saw day in and day out. He didn't know! He didn't know anything. He didn't even know his name. Omi. Persia had said it was Omi. But it sounded…strange…not quite right. But he didn't remember. Even his own reflection felt weird to him. He didn't remember anything. _

_He was his biggest stranger. _

_His chubby little arms wrapped themselves tighter around his legs as he rested his cheek on the top of one knee. He supposed it did make him a freak of some sort. The wide blue eyes blinked in the darkness. The pain those words created inside of him was just one of many and it raged within him—burning him hot and cold. He wanted to be held. To be comforted. Instead he was pushed aside and told to sit straighter. There were meetings going on, didn't he know? His eyes started to prickle and he closed them. But he knew no one here except Persia and that lady with the red hair. He was scared of them though. Persia was…Persia… The little boy frowned, pain making his forehead crease in between the eyebrows. Inside his head there was a faint echo of loud banging noises. But it made little sense to him. What did make sense to him was that he was no one. _

_He had no one. _

_He was loved by no one. _

_And without that kind of love,_

_He truly was…no one._

_He may have been little but he knew that much already. He knew that much…perhaps it was _that_ and not the lack of memories that truly made him a freak._

_The door to the office suddenly opened and Omi's eyes shot open, a silver trail making its way around the round cheeks. "You're thinking of doing what?" The words were hushed, the voice was slightly familiar but it was hard to tell around the beating of his heart. "He's a child! He should be placed in a foster home or an adoption center where he'll have some chance at being happy and living a normal life!" _

"_A normal life?" The other voice, gruffer and lower in pitch, Omi recognized instantly. He made himself smaller in the cubby. If Persia found him here again… "He has never known a normal life. No Taketori does." Ta-ke-to-ri? What was that? But the question was waved aside. It mattered little to the boy whose only fear was at being caught in a place where he had no right to be in. "This is his only chance at getting revenge. His only path to make everything right…" _

"_Your revenge, not his!" The words were snapped with vehemence. "Children that age don't need or want revenge. They only ..."_

"_I've already made my decision." Persia interrupted. "It's not up for discussion." The silence that followed stretched like a snake uncoiling from its tight weave upon a high branch. It was in the silence that Omi realized who the other voice belonged to. That woman. That woman with the red hair and piercing eyes. _

"_What do you want me to do?" _

"_He'll need to be trained and he'll need his paperwork. I already gave you the information to complete his files." _

_"Anything else?" There was sound and Omi was confused by it. He couldn't make sense out of it and was too scared to peek out from his hiding place. But it sounded like the woman with the red hair had gasped as if she was being jerked towards someplace—and that scared Omi—and then it was like she'd been caught. And the gasp that came from her then was different and a little wet. And…_

"_Tell me you'll stand by me…" There was a little laugh that didn't sound happy. There was the sound of high heels clicking softly on the hard floor. _

"_You know, we're supposed to try and be real…" It didn't make any sense at all. The words, the sounds…Grownups didn't make any sense at all. He was scared and he wanted to cry but last time he had…He bit his lip. Persia had… "And I feel alone, and we're not together. And that is real" Persia had gotten angry. Cold angry. Not hot angry. And Omi had felt ashamed. He curled tighter into his hiding spot backing into it as far as he could. _

_All the time, hoping and wishing that no one would find him there as he felt that cold anger well up in the room at the resounding sound of a door being slammed shut. _

_Can't wash it all away_

I grimaced tasting the blood that was washing my mouth in a reddish tint. I'd bitten my lip hard enough to split it when the gun shot had first gone through me. Damn it. It was nothing really. A deep scratch. I'd been lucky that the bullet had only grazed my skin and hadn't gotten buried in my side. Still, it hurt like hell. I placed my hand on the wound, frowning a bit as I felt the wet warmth seeping through my t-shirt and the make shift bandage.

I had been slow. No worse than that. I'd been acting as if one of my partners had been there, watching my back as I tried to download the pertinent information from the database. Solo missions. I closed my eyes for a moment as I trekked back to our safe house after making sure that no one could possibly trace me back. Solo missions meant being alone. It was strange. I hadn't had a solo mission since the formation of Weiss. I'd gotten so used to having someone there, covering for me.

I'd have to adapt and adapt fast if I wanted to survive the next mission. And with that thought, I carefully opened the front door. I stilled, listening the sounds in the house. It was silent save for the creaking of the wood adjusting from the day's humidity and heat to the night's coolness.

I had basically ordered Ran to spend these past couple nights with Aya-chan. In some way, Aya-chan's discovery of her parents' death couldn't have come at a better time as horrid as it was, it at least got Ran away from me during the night I needed to 'work'. The girl was starting to be plagued by vague nightmares. And I understood all to well the pain in waking from them. I could only hope that her older brother's presence would help and not cause either of them to break.

The bathroom was cooler than the rest of the house and it felt good to start the slow process of cleaning myself. My breath hitched as pain shot through me when I shrugged my black t-shirt off and over my head. Next the make shift bandage came off. It was a part of the shirt I had shredded with my pocket knife. I bundled my clothes up together and placed them to the side. The pain was ignored as I went and stood under the hot jet of water. The water turned a rusty red which grew darker and darker as I started to scrub every patch of skin I could reach.

Too soon, I left the warmth of the shower and toweled myself off, wrapping it finally around my hips and ignoring its reddening tint. I turned to the mirror to see how bad the damage really was. The problem with showers is that it gets the blood flowing and it sometimes may cause minor scratches to seem like major causes of blood loss. However, I was rather pale. I mumbled a curse on my breath and fingered the wound. It was in an awkward place—on my side yet inching towards my spine. Stitches. I let out a sigh. I'd need some and I wouldn't be able to stitch myself.

Damn. Damn. Damn.

I rinsed the shower free of blood and looked the bathroom over to make certain that it was clean before grabbing my clothes.

_Can't wish it all away_

One knock and Ken's door flew open from under my fist. "What is it?" He grumbled but his eyes flew open and he stared at me before pulling me in. "Omi—you…"

"Ken-kun, I need your help." I started simply, making sure to close the door behind me. "But you have to keep quiet about this. It's important."

"Since when have you been taking solo missions?" He snarled ignoring my words. A light was hastily turned on. I stood still as he assessed my status. He physically turned me around and hissed at finding the bullet graze.

"I need stitches."

"Damn straight you do." He let go of my arm and moved away from me to grab a first aid kit that each of us have hidden in our own rooms. Some habits are hard to kill. "Sit and answer my questions, Omi or by god I don't know what I'll do…"

"It's my first." I answered as evenly as I could, trying to release the tension within me.

"What the hell was Manx thinking?" Ken growled, tearing an alcohol swab free from its packaging. He dabbed the wound carefully but not carefully enough to prevent the sting that rode up my spine and back down to my toes. I closed my eyes, forcing my breath out through my nose while I bit my lip to keep quiet. The worse was yet to come. The cold metal of the needle pierced the skin and Ken's free hand came to settle on my bare shoulder. He would pin me down if I moved. The warm weight of that hand was a silent reminder of that. I counted the movements as Ken worked. One. "Mission status?" He asked. Two. Couldn't answer yet. Three. Tears came and flowed unbidden. Four. It hurt like a bitch and the feeling of thread being pulled through your skin to bind two pieces of it back together was—Five—fuck! Six. "Breath Omi." The one hand that wasn't doing the sewing squeezed my shoulder. Seven. "I'm almost done." Eight… He tightened the whole thing and made a crude knot before snipping the sterilized thread. "There you go." I gulped the air in, my shoulders heaving. I was going to be sick. "It's ok." I was… "It's ok." I swallowed hard, the bile that had risen burning as it went back down. "Shh…" I was drenched by a cold sweat yet felt feverishly warm. I needed another shower again.

"Status—completed successfully." I started weakly. "Target…" Ken nodded, understanding. The target had been found and eliminated, the information gathered. He bandaged my side carefully and helped me put my night shirt on. "What time is it?"

"Some time around 3." I felt him shift away from me to look. "You should go to bed." His tone was light yet behind it I could hear the tension and anger that was no doubt eating away at his self-restraint. He would want more answers and soon.

"Need to clean first." I countered softly. My mission clothes—the shorts at least, the shirt could be burned—my weapons—blood rusts away at the metal, weakening it and, I blinked feeling a bit light headed for a second—the list could go on. I moved my foot and was startled to feel a damp, fluffy fabric tickle its sole. The towel. I definitely had to clean the towel and get it back to the bathroom before morning. "Ken-kun," I started turning to face him. "Thank you." His frown deepened for a moment before he gave a little groan.

"Whatever." He mumbled. "Just tell me everything tomorrow once you've gotten sleep. You need it. You look like you're ready to pass out." I nodded, smiling weakly. Before I left his room completely though, I found that I couldn't keep myself from asking…

"Were they ok tonight?" Ken snorted.

"Better than you. Now go!"

_Can't cry it all away_

I hung up the now clean and dry towel, hands reveling at the soft texture. It was clean. I felt myself waver, my eyes closing for a second or two before snapping open. I pushed myself away. It was six already… I'd barely finished everything I had needed to do. My weapons were already back in their hiding spot, all of them except those that were carefully hidden on me at all times.

Paranoid?

Just a bit.

I rubbed at my eyes. It was tempting to go to my room and fall asleep…but… The wooden floors creaked. They were starting to wake up. I couldn't. I couldn't risk it. If I had another nightmare... I shook my head and walked to the kitchen. The simple activity was enough to keep me going, effectively pushing exhaustion at bay.

"Good morning." Ran muttered the greeting, his red hair still mussed from sleep. "I thought I heard you in here…" He moved around me, reaching for a coffee cup. He filled it and went to sit at the kitchen table. It made sense that he'd recognized it was me. I knew how to tell the others apart…it may seem strange but everyone has a distinct sound to them. The mornings especially. I simply smiled at him. And it was interesting as I looked at him, to find that he was doing the same thing. Each of us looking at the other, seeing how we were doing…assessing status. He placed the steaming cup down a small frown on his face. "You didn't sleep."

"Did Aya-chan and you sleep ok?" I asked, avoiding the question hanging in the air. His frown grew. "Did she have a nightmare?" I pushed further, worry coloring my every word. Ran shook his head.

"She slept well."

"Good." Smile firmly back in place, I turned back to the breakfast. I filled his plate first and handed it to him. I wasn't surprised when Aya-chan ran in, hair still damp from her quick shower. She was in mid process of braiding it when she took her place next to her older brother. She gifted the two of us with a smile, exclaiming the yumminess of breakfast and in the same breath asking me how I was doing. Another door closed and footsteps could be heard moving towards us. I filled another plate, placing it in Yoji's spot. There was no doubt that Yoji was happy he'd beaten Ran to the bathroom this once because the older man came in, smug grin on his face.

"Hey kiddo!" His hand came to tug at my hair before he slumped in his chair. We were all in the process of eating when Ken came in. He was yawning, hand running through his hair and then he looked at all of us and just shut his mouth with a snap.

"What are you—" He growled. "Omi!" The awful thing about being assassins is the killer impulses we all have to bury deep within us the minute someone gets into our personal spaces. The worse was just after a mission when there was a mixture a bone weary exhaustion and left over adrenaline running through your body. When Ken grabbed at me and pulled me out of the kitchen, it was all I could do from fighting back. It must have been noticeable because the minute we were out of hearing distance he let go and pointed to the nearby couch. "Sleep! Now!"

"Oy Ken-kun." I massaged my injury gingerly and pouted. "I was eating…"

"Sleep." The way he said it made it sound like he would force it upon me if I didn't do it by myself. Blinking up at him, I wondered if that was even humanly possible.

"But," I sighed, sitting down at the edge of the couch. Weakly, I looked back from where we had come from. "I can't."

"I'll keep a watch over you and keep them away." Ken hissed, the muscles in jaw working furiously. "Seriously Omi." He did understand. "You need the sleep and don't forget, you've got a lot of explaining to do afterwards." As if he'd let me forget.

"What will you tell them?"

"That you were worried you'd have a nightmare last night and you didn't wanna wake everyone up so you went for a walk all of last night and I heard you coming back in early morning. Don't ask. I figured you'd pull something like this on me after you left my room. It left me time to think of a plan. Now go to sleep."

"Oh." Well ok then. I gave him a genuine smile and tried to make myself comfortable. "Thank you Ken-kun." He only grunted in reply as he perched on the one arm.

To be continued…

A/N- Thank you all for the support you've been giving me. It's really been helpful as I continue to write this.  I also, again apologize for the slow updates. I'm having problems with my wrists but I'm working that out. ;P. Anywho, until next time!!!


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Hours later, I found myself walking towards the town hand in hand with Aya-chan. I had slept an hour, long enough to keep me going for the rest of the day. Interestingly enough and to Ken's growing irritation, we hadn't had any time to discuss anything more concerning my late night activities. Or to be more accurate. Activity. In any case, one thing had led to another and we were all heading to town to do…I still wasn't sure what. I bit my lip to keep the growing sigh hidden deep within my chest. Tonight would be interesting, that was for sure.

The light touch against my own hand—soft a direct contrast to my hardened calluses, warm, slightly sweaty—was a nostalgic balm to my senses. How many times had Ouka snuck up from behind, grabbing at my hand and dragging me god knows where to do who knows what? And how many times had I tensed wanting to shirk the touch and hide from her slightly-overbearing presence? And now? Now I can only wish for her to appear before me, to hear her voice calling out my name, to have her bully me and scoff at her naïve yet strong willed attitude towards life.

I had never deserved her.

Did I deserve this?

A sunny day, with Ran, Ken, Yoji and Aya-chan?

Unconsciously, her hand tightened around my own as she tugged the two of us forward. We were well ahead of the others, Yoji preferring the more sedate pace as he needlessly teased Ken into a fury about his _freakish_ sport fetish and being in shape. The two were battling it out at who could walk the slowest. Ran was simply walking, an efficient, brisk walk with a no nonsense air about him yet keeping himself at a distance between the four of us.

His presence behind me made me want to turn around and see exactly where he was, what sort of expression would be on his face… But almost too suddenly, his presence wasn't the only one that I needed to keep aware of. We had finally reached the town. People were bustling all around and now it was my turn to tighten my hold on Aya-chan's hand.

Scanning the crowds for potential danger, I was slightly surprised when Aya-chan simply stopped walking. Her weight jolted me into a halt as well and I could only take in her pensive expression and wonder at its meaning. A slight frown formed between her eyebrows and she bit her lower lip. There was nothing I could say at that moment that would have reached her so I simply looked away and instead followed to where her gaze was resting.

Strange.

A music store.

The window was filled with music sheets and in the shaded parts where the sun glare wasn't blinding to the eye; I could make out the various instruments that were for sale. Her hand left mine. The loss was cold and with little thought I wiped my hand on my jeans before taking a step forward as well. When she went in without a word, I barely had the time to glance back and catch Ran's eye before following her in. A flash of amethyst and red head bopping up and down was all I needed to know that he knew.

A little bell chimed and announced our presence as the door slammed shut behind us. The store was like a breath of fresh air compared to the sweltering heat outside. An old woman was behind a dusty counter and my heart pounded hard in my chest as I took in her sweet wrinkled face.

Maybe it was lack of sleep or the spilling of blood once more—the renewal of my real life—my only life that was making me so sensitive. Thinking of Ouka, of Momoe-chan… I stared at that kind face for far too long than was polite but she simply smiled, her head cocked to the side. Puzzled. But not worried in any way. Simply taking me in as well and I could only sputter an excuse of some sort before going to find Aya-chan to leave her sight. My cheeks were a screaming hot red.

The girl was standing in front of a piano. It was black and sleek and the keys were an ivory color. Like everything else in the store, there was just the slightest sheen of dust covering its surface. Aya-chan looked up, her hand that had been barely tracing the keys jerked back to her side.

"Omi…" She whispered. "Could you?" She waved towards the piano stool.

"Hm?" I asked coming closer.

"Could you play…something?" Could I? I stared at her, wide eyed. It was almost too cold in here. The hair on my arms was rising and goose bumps were running up and down my arms. "Please?" I sat and stared.

"Aya-chan, I don't think I can play anything." I started slowly. "I've never…" Persia hadn't included learning how to play instruments in my training. What sort of assassin would need that knowledge? A spy maybe? But an assassin…Yet my hands uncurled from the tense coil they'd adopted and almost shyly they pressed down on the cool keys.

The noise it made was louder than I expected and I sat straighter where I was. It was almost like a reprimand the silence that followed, the slight shifting of Aya-chan behind me. So my hands pressed down again and something deep within me simply disconnected.

There was a calmness that swallowed me as a whole, a feeling of lightness and heaviness warring within my stomach with each note that rang into the air. A dullness.

At first.

The hands weren't mine as they moved down the space making that music.

At first…

They couldn't be mine because I'd never played.

At first…

I could count on one hand the times I'd been near a piano.

Tick

The first was at a target's house. Right?

Tock.

The hands that continued to move, graceful in their flurried action were pale. They should have been paler. The fingers should have been more slender, the nails slightly longer and more well taken care of. They should have been a comforting sight. A sense of warmth and softness. They should have been…

Tick

There should have been the ticking presence keeping rhythm. A little hypnotizing piece of woodwork and metal settled on a small table nearby…It'd been his job to get it started right. It'd been his…

Tock.

His? There was an intake of air behind me. A warm strong grasp on my shoulder. The music stopped. The hands stopped playing. They simply stopped where they were, laying there limply as if they'd been cut off from the rest of the body. My body. My. Body.

"Omi?"

I shivered.

"Get him out of here Ken." Yoji. He sounded worried. Why? I blinked at the hands that were still pressing down on the last keys they'd been playing. There wasn't any danger, was there? When had they even come in? I hadn't heard them come in. And that should have bothered me more than the hands. Those stupid, stupid hands. Simply limp hands and music…

The hands on my shoulder tugged and the hands moved.

"Omi. Let's go…"

"Aya-chan wanted me to play." Was that me? "I can't play piano Ken-kun. I can't play…" Why was I crying? "I can't…" Why was I crying? "…play." There was no reason to cry. No reason to feel like I'd run the marathon. No reason to feel like I'd been given another piece to an endless puzzle.

"I know Omi. It's ok." Rough hands. Tan. Suddenly in my vision and wiping my face as tenderly as they can. And I love him for trying but it's almost too much. The disconnection is gone and I'm me. I'm only me.

A broken doll.

Don't. Touch. Me.

A cracked mask that's suddenly been ripped raw.

Don't. Look. At. Me.

Perhaps it wasn't seeing Ran's cracked mask that had been uncomfortable. Perhaps it was seeing it and recognizing that mine was failing as well. A reflection.

Don't. See.

I don't even want to see me. I don't want to see…to know… no more. Just let me be. And isn't that funny? Isn't that just fucking hilarious? All I ever wanted were the answers. Now that they're coming back and there's no hope for that grand _happy _family reunion, all I want is oblivion again.

Sweet black oblivion.

"I'm fine." Push the hands away. Stand up. Walk out the store. The outside world is bright compared to the dim little store. It's blinding and that's good.

_Can't scratch it all away_

There's nothing really to say. So no one says much of anything. The only whispered conversation that makes it past the haze of numbness that surrounds me is only that Aya-chan too is in tears. As to why, I'm not really sure. Whatever Ran is doing doesn't seem to be going very well. Or helping.

A warm body is suddenly walking next to me.

A hand grabs my own. Not Ken's. Not Yoji's. Definitely not Ran's.

Anchored.

Her hand isn't simply holding mine. Both of her hands are wrapped around my arm as if I'm the only thing in her world that's keeping steady. That's staying still and anchoring her.

_Why couldn't you be him?_

She's chosen the wrong one of the four of us to get attached to.

I guess it doesn't really matter anyway.

It seems like it's easier said than done.

To be continued…


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

It was hours later when Aya-chan had been tucked away safely in her own bed that Ken found his chance to speak to me alone. He carefully placed a hand around my bicep and half-pulled half-dragged me outside, telling Yoji with an all too wide of a smile on his face that we were going for a walk. The older man simply looked at us warily before shrugging and going back to reading a mystery novel he'd randomly found in the house.

We walked further and further into the wooded area, tripping on broken branches that littered the forest floor as well as causing younger ones to snap here and there from the smaller trees as we marched right into them. It was getting too dark to actually see where we were going. But I stayed quiet. Ken would stop when he felt like it and not before. It never really did anything to try and butt heads with him when he was so focused.

And I…I was tired anyway.

"Ok." Ken breathed out. "Sit." He waved his arm a little ahead of him and I blinked into the darkness. Squinting, I thought I could make out larger stones. I gingerly headed towards one and sat on it, pulling my knees to my chest. "Now…" He hesitated as he sat on the one next to mine. "Spill, I need to know when exactly Manx contacted you to start taking missions up again, what this mission was about, and if more are to come…And don't skip _any_ detail." He grounded out.

…

"There you have it, Ken-kun."

"I don't like it." You don't have to, I thought, wishing this little talk was done and over with. I tried to stretch a little from the position I was in. My back was one big build up of tension and I could feel the stitches pulling at my skin. They burned and itched. Which was never a good sign. I would have to ask him to check them before the night was over. "You know she's going to give you more." That was the plan. Not that I could tell him that. I gave a minute shrug. "Omi…Let me come with you on these."

"No."

"Why?" He asked, irritated at my quick answer.

"Because," I started. "It would make it too obvious. We said we would hide our "lives" from her. We can't do it successfully if there's more than one of us leaving at night. It's not the first time I've gone solo. It'll be fine." And before he could interrupt me, I quickly added. "She needs you here. Ran needs you here." I felt his body turn so he could look at me sharply. Perhaps it had been a good idea to do this in the dark. I couldn't see his facial expression and neither could he see mine.

"I think you're wrong about who it is they need to have here." I ignored the words and rubbed at my face.

"I…" I bit my lip wondering if I should tell the next piece. "When Manx came the last time, she saw that we were all mission ready." I hissed a sigh. "Physically that is and that I had lied to her." That had made for an interesting conversation. I looked up at the sky to keep from remembering the flashing of her eyes. So cold and angry. So much like Persia's now. "I made a deal with her."

"A deal." The voice was flat.

"Yes. A deal." I rested my forehead on my knees, rubbing at the sweat that had started gathering there. "I don't want it broken." There was a moment of silence broken only by Ken's terse shifting and angry breathing. It was strange seeing him trying to stay so composed.

"You on solo missions for us to stay like this?" He asked finally. "How long can that last?"

"…as long as we need it to." I turned to him and grabbed at his arm. We were face to face, closer than usual simply because it was the only way to even see a little of what was written in our expressions. "Please." The rest of my plea went unspoken. I didn't need to put everything into words. Ken had been in Kritiker long enough to know how it worked. He also knew Manx. And he knew this was Ran's last chance…

"I _don't_ like it." He repeated helplessly, turning away. "It shouldn't be like this! It shouldn't fucking have to be like this…" His curled fist slammed down into rock and I suppressed a wince at the sound it made. That must have hurt.

"Ken-kun…" I reprimanded, reaching for his hand and taking it into my own. "You're such an idiot." Everything…would be ok. I rested my head gingerly on his shoulder while my fingers gently inspected his hand, noticing the broken skin and the warm blood that was slowly but surely making its way out in beaded pearls of red. There would be swelling but no damage to the bones. "Let's go back." I suggested finally. There was nothing left to discuss and no argument that could be made that would change my mind or the path I had chosen to take. He gave a stiff nod and stood up, taking his hand back. For a moment, I thought he would just leave and not see if I followed. But he simply waited there. It was only as we were about to enter the house that he turned around and jerked me towards him by the neck of my t-shirt.

"I'll help you keep the deal by keeping my mouth shut and playing the good boy but…" He hissed. "Only on the one condition that you tell me when and where and what time each mission takes place…no more secrets." With that he let go and went inside. The door slamming shut behind him.

"There you two are." Yoji greeted me as I quickly followed Ken inside. The older man was smart enough not to question Ken directly as to why he had slammed the door in my face. "Did you enjoy your walk?" His one eyebrow was arched as he gave the brunet a wary look. He turned to me for an explanation for the dark scowl that was currently shadowing Ken's face.

"He tripped and hurt his hand." Yoji's expression turned understanding and he shook his head. I turned to Ken and motioned for him to go sit at the kitchen table. "We should take care of that."

"I could have told you that would happen." The older man muttered, following us there. "Really. Who goes out for a walk when it's dark out?" He lit his cigarette and gazed at us carefully.

"A couple of idiots. That's who." Ken muttered back, letting himself fall into the nearest chair and swinging his hand into my face. "Make it quick. I want to take a shower before going to bed." After getting the necessary materials and disinfecting the wound, I quickly bandaged it up. Yoji remained silent, watching us.

"Make sure you don't get it wet, Ken-kun." I called out to his disappearing back. I started to put everything away but couldn't help but hear Yoji's sure footsteps follow Ken's and then…nothing. I sighed.

_Intermission_

"A word with you Ken?" Yoji braced himself against the bedroom door. The wood was an uncomfortable hardness—its coolness seeping through the light material of his clothing—but he slouched against it anyway. The younger man turned to look at him with surprise, pausing in the process of taking his shirt off.

"Sure." He muttered before pulling the sweaty garment over his head. Yoji let himself in and closed the door behind him. He glanced at the room, not having been in here before. The only rooms of this house he'd seen was his own, the kitchen, the bathroom, and living room. He'd stayed away from the other rooms…the only exception being Aya-chan's of course. But being in the other's bedrooms had always felt like too much of an intrusion.

Touching upon their own personal world. Seeing the little details that defined who they were beyond the partner that Yoji had come to know and depend upon. His green eyes carefully took in the pile of dirty clothes that were half-hazardly perched on a chair in the corner. A grass stained soccer ball was resting on the bed, on the pillow actually and Yoji couldn't quite suppress the little shudder at that. No wonder the kid had so little dates.

"Uh…" Ken cleared his throat, actually looking slightly amused and less pissed than he had been just minutes before. The kid was a friggin' walking emotional poster boy for mood swings. One second it pours, the next it shines or thunders but never, _never_ a dull moment. "You said you wanted a word?" The boy—because really Ken and Omi were both kids in his eyes—sat down on the edge of his bed. "What about?"

Yoji took another glance around the room, wondering if he could sit somewhere. He realized idly that he was hesitating still at getting himself further involved in their lives and that really, he could do _without_ the sitting at the moment. Still he took his time before sighing and gingerly sitting down on the only patch of floor that had been mess-free.

"You live like a pig, Ken." He muttered, earning him a chuckle or two rather than an aggressive come back. "I'm worried about Omi." He started quickly after that. "His memories…the flashbacks… We've never seen him break down the way we did at that music store Ken." The dark look was back with a vengeance on that young face. It matched his own dark thoughts and emotions that pulsed along with the beat of blood. Sometimes he wondered how much they had never seen because they hadn't wanted to, because Omi was that good at hiding it, or simply because it had never occurred before. He didn't like two of the options and he knew it was too naïve of him to believe that this hadn't happened before.

What did that make them?

What did it say about them?

"Yeah." Ken finally said. "I don't know what to do about that one. It's not like Omi's really good at accepting help. At least not with personal matters." He cleared his throat. "You?"

"I was thinking…"

_End of Intermission_

"Ran-kun?"

"She's already asleep." He stated calmly from where he'd been sitting. His back had been propped up against a couple of my pillows. The book that he'd been reading when I'd come in was lowered slowly to his chest. "She's…fine." He started slowly, his eyes taking me in.

"Okay but…"

"She didn't want me to stay." Ran interrupted, eyes suddenly looking away.

"Oh." I didn't know what else to say. The 'I'm sorry…' that was on the tip of my tongue stayed sealed behind my closed lips. Part of me was relieved to hear it because part of me had missed this. Had missed the uncomfortable closeness and Ran's warmth behind my back and the feel of his chest moving up and down as his breathing slowed and… and… my eyes felt weird. I shut them for a moment. When had Ran's need turned into mine? My heart ached. When had the arrangement changed? He would hate me if he knew.

"You haven't been sleeping…" Ran started again. "Perhaps you should try now."

"Yeah." I walked over to my side of the bed. (How weird was that? Having _a_ side.) I made my way under the sheets with a minute shake of the head, wishing I could dispel all the thoughts that were making my head feel so heavy. I almost wished that some of the numbness that had been surrounding me since the afternoon could come back again. Keep everything at bay. The lights were turned off, a click resounding in the falling darkness, and there was the shifting of the mattress behind me. I turned to my side and winced just a bit. I hadn't gotten a chance to ask Ken to look at my wound. I let the breath I'd been holding in go. It would have to wait…

Everything was silent.

At first…

I closed my eyes as I reached out behind me and blindly grasped Ran's hand. He tensed at the touch, surprised because I had never initiated that contact before. Yet when I pulled, he came and his warmth that enveloped me finally was the needed balm that allowed me to close my eyes. They still prickled…damn them.

The one arm around me tightened.

And it was strange, but I'd never noticed before how loud another person's heart beat could sound as it slowly started to match the rhythm of my own.

_Lying beside you_

The room was large and open. The windows were huge and it was all I could do from not squirming off the wooden bench and running towards them. I bit my lip, glancing at her again and seeing how intent she was on the task before her. Maybe…just maybe…I could get away with just… I started to slip off the bench, enough so that my feet touched the ground instead of the tips of my toes. Another glance revealed that she was still looking at the sheets, frowning slightly as she made a quick note with her pencil. My movements had gone unnoticed. Slowly, I placed more weight on my feet until my butt was just centimeters off of the bench.

"Mamoru…" The voice chided, smile hidden within the exasperated tones. "Mother said she'd be done in just a second. Please sit still." My butt smacked back down but suddenly the bench was no longer underneath me. I was outside, both hands pressed on the windows looking in. Music—gentle but sad—was being played.

She was playing.

The piano's melody seemed to take a life of its own, weaving a story of a love unrequited—a blink and she's gone—but the music still plays on.

Only hands are there. Hers. Mine. Hers. Mine. Hers…

"Ma-mo-ru!" A deep voice murmurs behind me, eerily happy. I turn and Masafumi's grin widens. "Come play with me?" I'm no longer small. "You're very pretty." His hand—big, bigger than mine—reaches for me. "Mother's busy." Takes mine. "But I'm not. I'll make you prettier…you'll see." The grip scares me. I don't want to move from where I am. But the cool window pane leaves my touch as he tugs me forward. The music falters but then resumes as normal. It's no longer hands playing but Mother. My mother… Mother see me. Mother look at me. Mother make him stop. I don't want to play with him. I don't want to…I don't…

"No…no…no… no… NO! I don't…I don'—" Hot hands jerk me upright and it's only when one of them lets go to strike me in the cheek that my eyes snap open. The last of my plea is lost in a surprised hiccup. The physical pain is a shock to the system and any last hold that the nightmare had on my mind dissolves.

"Omi…" Ran hisses. "Wake up!" It's more like an order or a demand than anything else. It makes me wonder if that's how he talks to Aya-chan when she has these. I hope not. But the thought is silly and random and makes me release a weird noise. Not a chuckle. Not a whine. Not a sob. It's a strange noise. A scary noise. And it's coming from me. "Omi, please." I should probably tell him I'm awake. Because I am now. When has the man ever said please? Ever? Yes. He had before…weird. It seemed strange coming from him. Which doesn't help the situation. Perhaps I am still dreaming but I'm not. I know I'm not. Because mother is gone and always will be. And I still can't see her face or remember it clearly. Only her hands and her feet and now her music and… "Please."

There's only darkness here and Ran not even a foot away from me. His one hand is still tight around my arm, shaking a bit. I need to form the words. I need to say something but I can only blink and stare and…

It wasn't even that bad of a nightmare.

Slowly, I find myself moving. My fingers loosen his hold and make it so he's not holding quite so tight. I have a feeling that between him and Ken's tugging, I'll have bruises covering my entire upper arm.

I'm awake. I am…

"Omi?"

I close my eyes as his face comes closer to mine.

"I'm fine. I'm sorry. I didn't mean t—" His forehead is suddenly resting against mine and I flinch at the close proximity, eyes snapping open and then closing once more in a flash of embarrassment. His breath is warm as it rushes against my lips and cheek a strange contrast with the coolness of his skin. I realize suddenly that I'm hot and sweaty and I really don't need him to be this close to me right now. "Ran-kun!" The exclamation is weak and doesn't sound half as surprised as it should. Why can't I push him off anyway?

"Don't move." I'm not, I want to protest. I haven't. But I still can't stop from jerking slightly away when his free hand comes and cups my cheek before moving to touch my one ear. His other hand is still trapped by mine. He pulls away with a sigh and without a word rolls off the bed and leaves the room.

_Listening to you breathe_

What the hell?

I sink into the bed and shiver at the loss of contact and sudden warmth. I'm still hot but it's different and lonely. My head starts to feel heavy again and it's all I can do to keep my eyes open. I give up the fight. He's probably not coming back again.

Had I kicked him during my nightmare? Pissed him off somehow or someway? Probably… I curled into a ball, hiding my face in my pillow as much as I could while still being able to breathe. I'd have to apologize in the morning…

A gentle touch prodded me back into wakefulness. Whoever it was, was being very careful in how they approached me. They were close enough to touch but far away that I couldn't inflict any major damage if I had needed to.

"I'm awake." I started, blinking my eyes. "I am. I swear." No nightmares. Just sweet oblivion.

"It's ok Omi." Ken. "You have a fever." He came closer slowly. When he saw that I _was_ indeed awake, he moved faster and sat by my side. He placed a glass on the night table before coming to face me. One hand came up to touch my forehead before moving to the cheek and ear. Very reminiscent of Ran's earlier touch. Ken sighed and let his hand drop away.

"Wh--?" What the heck was going on?

"Can you sit up?" Yes. I pushed the covers away with one hand as I touched my forehead with the other. How could I—Ran caught it mid movement and pushed it back down. He was back? When? What? Why? The redhead was back on his side of the bed, kneeling by my side as he watched. "Here's some medicine, drink all of it. I think you caught something—maybe a mild cold—from going from hot to cold so much yesterday. I always thought A.C. was bad for the health."

"Ken-kun," I started pushing away the glass of water and whatever he'd added to it. "You're rambling."

"Yeah well. You gave him quite the scare apparently." Ken huffed. "And if you managed to freak him out…" The man trailed off giving Ran a side glance. "It must have been bad, that's all I'm saying. So drink up." When I didn't move to take hold of the glass, Ken sighed and shrugged. He put the glass back down again and crossed his arms over his chest. "What do you think? Should I pin him down while you pour the damn thing down his mouth?"

"Ken-kun!"

To be continued…

A/N – Sorry for the lack of updates. It's no excuse but life has just gotten crazily busy again. I'm going to try and do better. Part of the next chapter is already partially written so hopefully, it won't be as long as last time before I update again. Thanks for the patience and all your helpful feedback, I truly appreciate it.


End file.
